Quite simply, kitsch is the junk sold on the street to American tourists at or near famous landmarks. Elements of proper kitsch include the overuse of bright paints and shiny metals, "clever" american slang incorporated into the design, and workmanship quality of the lowest order.
Tiny models of the Eiffel Tower garrishly coated in gold colored paint, wooden beer steins with a forest scene carved into the outside, disgusting parts of local wildlife stuffed and mounted to display for your viewing pleasure. Kitsch collections are universally recognized as one of the signs of the apocalypse.
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