a totally useless twat / dickhead / pratt / knob
you fucking gonk mother fucker
av bubsey 18. september 2005
Glasgow, Scots.

Synonymous with blowjob
Geez a gonk ye dobber!
av Superbo 2. februar 2005
n. Has several, widespread meanings - often depending on geography - such as blowjob or underwear. Can also be used as a generic insult.

The word is best used, however, to describe enemies who must be eliminated in videogames.
Me (playing Goldeneye: Jesus, I'm getting blasted to fuck here! There's way too many gonks!
You (advising me): There's one to your right...
Me: Oh shit, I'm dead. These gonks just didn't stop. Fucking gonks.
av Terry Deary 7. desember 2006
To be beaten to death by a large black rubber dildo.

In the movie Lock Stock and Two smoking barrels, the character Hatchet Harry, beats a man, suspected of stealing, to death with what happened to be at hand. Harry, also a porn shop owner, happened to grab a big black rubber cock.

This term arose due to the unwieldlyness of the lengthy phrase "He was beaten to death with a large black rubber cock..." and was shortened to simply, "He got gonked."
Hatchet Harry gonked some bloke for stealing from him.

If these guys keep pissing us off like this, I'm gonna gonk them.
av sonik 6. februar 2005
The true definition of "gonk" is when you backhand a guy right in the nuts. Saying the word "gonk" at the same time is required. The word gonk is used by only the best of all backhanders. Are you the best?
The script you follow:
You - (Backhanding the guy becide you) "GONK!"
Other Guy - "Aww fuck. What the hell was that for?"

"I gonked that other guy the other day."
"Lets have a truce. No gonking eachother."
av Brogan Scott Houston McIntyre 28. oktober 2006
"to gonk" can mean anything you want it to mean... its is the Willy Wonka of words and can be used in any circumstance
gonkfabulation/gonkathon/gonknodes/gonkalicious/gonktastic

"what an amazing gonkathon that was you gonking gonkhead... now suck my gonk"
av Dave The Ravid 3. august 2005
Another word used for a blowjob.
NED says to another NED: "GEES A GONK YAH DOBBER!"
av Gerry Mckenna 23. mai 2007

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