All the evil on this earth condensed into a rather obese 10 year old boy,sadly,He depicts what most of us are like..,He is a rude,Crazy,Bad mouthed,Anti-Semitic,Racist,Witty,Cunning,Stubborn,Obese bastard.

Full Name:Eric Theodore Cartman

Relatives:Liane cartman,the biggest whore in america

:The other fat cartmans,all of them are

fatter versions of him

Enjoys: Watching terrance and phillip,,making anyone feel like shit and eating.

Dislikes: pretty much everything else

He is fucking insane.
Once he got a kid to eat his own parents because he owed him $10.
In imagination land the christmas critters he invented in a fucking weird story give someone HIV then killed them.....

Ah well it's still the funniest shit on this depressing earth
(its funnier then watching telitubbies when ur high)
Eric Cartman Is The Shit!!(And also the most fucked up cartoon character in the world)
av FucktardedScarecrow 19. juni 2009
The Fat Ass Of South Park. He is Funny and the best person on the show. Cartmen is extremly offensive to jews and black people. Cartmens Mom is also a hoe.
Kyle: Hey Cartmen Can I Have Some Candy?
Cartmen: Lets See hmm Nope Im Sorry Kyle I don't Have Any Jew Candy
Kyle: Fuck You Fat Ass


Cat: meeeooow
Cartmen: no kitty this is my pot pie
Cat: meooooowww
Cartmen: Mooommm Kitty's bein a dildo.
Cartmen's Mom : well then i know a certain kitty-kitty thats sleeping with mommy tonight.
Cat: Meeooooooow?
av J- Fizzle 11. juni 2005
racist, fat, mean-spirited, sexually confused, and funny as hell. A main character on the popular animated show South Park. he hangs out with Kyle Brovloski Stan Marsh and Kenny Mccormick. constanly makes fun off Kyle for being a Jew. He lives with his mother, and we never see his father. He constantly is coming up with crazy plans to make money or just has stupid ideas in order to have fun. He is very whiny at times. He is The Coon
Eric Cartman: "SHUT UP, YOU FILTHY JEW!"

Example 2
Eric Cartman: "Mom, can i get a Chinpokomon toy?"
Mom: "No, poopykins"
Eric Cartman: "But meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem! I want the toy before Kyle gets it so i can be coooooooooooooooool."
av Stan Kyle Kenny Cartman 26. januar 2011
Eric Cartmen is a character in South Park. In most episodes he is the focus of the show. He is extremely negative and destructive in his thoughts and actions. That might have something to do with the fact that his mother is a hermaphrodite town slut and he is big boned(not fat).
1. Eric Cartmen : Now I am done measuring everyone's penis size.

Stan : Dude, your penis size is yet to measured.

Eric : I measured mine this morning. It is 13.7" long.

Stan : Your penis is not 13.7". We'll measure your penis in front of witnesses.

Eric : Now you want to measure guys' penises? What are you, a HOMO?

Stan : You just measured everyone's penis.

Eric : OK FINE.

Stan : (Measures Eric's penis size) It is 1.2".


Eric : Mom! I want iPad2 with 64gb and 3g.

Eric's Mom : Eric, that is too expensive. We can't afford that. Look here, you can get Toshiba's tablet instead. It has all the features of iPad and is much cheaper.


Eric' Mom : I am not buying that.

Eric : (Turns his back towards his mom, squats and gets down his pant) Mom why don't you take me to the Greasemonkey. I liked to be lubed before I get FUCKED.
av sooommmeeoonnneeeee 10. juli 2011
Cartman is an elementary school student who lives with his mother in the fictional town of South Park, Colorado, where he routinely has extraordinary experiences atypical of a small town. Cartman has been portrayed as aggressive, prejudiced, arrogant, and narcissistic since his character's inception; Stone and Parker describe the character as "a little Archie Bunker". These traits are significantly augmented in later seasons as his character evolves, and he begins to exhibit extremely psychopathic, sociopathic and manipulative behavior, and also be depicted as highly intelligent, able to execute morally appalling plans and business ideas with success.

Cartman is considered to be the most popular character on South Park.234 Parker and Stone state that he is their favorite character, and the one with whom they most identify. South Park has received both praise and criticism for Cartman's politically incorrect behavior. Prominent publications and television channels have included Cartman on their lists as one of the most iconic television and cartoon characters of all time.
. “I would never let a woman kick my @ss. If she tried something, I’d be like, HEY! You get your b*tch @ss back in the kitchen and make me some pie!”

2. “Why does this happen every month? It seems like right about the same time every month, Kyle’s mom gets a bug up her @ss about something, and I always end up getting screwed by it.”

3. “Too bad drinking scotch isn’t a paying job or Kenny’s dad would be a millionaire!”

4. “If some sissy chick tried to kick my @ss I would say hey, missy, go knit me a sweater before I slap you in the face!”

5. “Mom — kitty is being a dildo.” — Eric Cartman

“I know a special little kitty that’s sleeping with mommy tonight.” — Cartman’s mom replies

6. “Kenny’s family is so poor that yesterday, they had to put their cardboard box up for a second mortgage.”

7. “Anyway Kenny, Yellow MegaMan is only $8.95, so maybe your mom can put it on layaway and make payments for a year or two.”

8. “Well I looked in my moms closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an ultravibe pleasure 2000.”

9. “It’s an Afghanistan goat, so it can’t stay here, or else it’ll choke on the sweet air of freedom.” — Cartman on a goat sent to him and his friends by some kids in Afghanistan.

10. “Dude, dolphins are intelligent and friendly!” — Wendy

“Intelligent and friendly on rye bread, with some mayonaise.” — Cartman
av LilManJD 12. mai 2016
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